Live life through passion
and life will live passionately
I grew up in Indiana with both of my parents, my older brother Kurt and my younger brother Dustin. I knew from a young age that music literally made my heart dance. Everytime I heard a song that I loved my heart would skip a beat. I could get lost for hours in listening. I started playing piano at a young age and was blessed enough to have my grandmother be my teacher. There was just something about the way my hands felt when they hit the keyboard. It made sense to me like nothing else did. I would daydream for hours especially when I got to middle and highschool about what it would be like to be on a stage playing my own music.
As I grew older fear settled in. The fear of performing. What if I made a mistake, what if I forgot how to play my piece, what if I get up there and embarrass myself? Soon that fear took an ugly turn in my life. And it wasn't just with music. I had anxiety over everything. School, friends, family life and where exactly I fit in to all of it. That fear consumed my every being...and I gave up.
I finished college and found a new love in skin care. I started a program and graduated with flying colors. Before graduation I got engaged to my boyfriend. My instructor took me to the side and said, "I know you think you love him, but your talent can take you places. I know people in California and Las Vegas and can talk to those contacts for you". Again the anxiety settled in. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was so terrified of my potential I hid behind it. I had an addiction. Not to drugs or alcohol but to fear. If I hid behind that fear I never had to reach my fullest potential therefore, I could never fail. What I didn't realize until much later was not trying was the greatest fail of a lifetime. And this was my lifetime we're talking about.
Needless to say I didn't take my instructor up on her offer. I got married instead. I had never lived a loveless life until I got married. Little by little I felt the life getting sucked out of me. The relationship was unhealthy from the start, but I wanted to believe eventually it would turn into what I wanted. Instead it continued to spiral into ugliness and I felt like I was drowning in it. At one point I knew I had to leave. It was the wisdom of my own heart that told me life should be expected to be beyond what this will ever be. If you leave you will have the life you have always wanted. What I couldn't have realized back then was that by leaving, life would be beyond anything I could ever imagine.
I thought the simple solution to my happiness was getting a divorce. Once my divorce was finalized I still wasn't happy. I had a successful business in skin care, a new career in nursing but I still felt as if I was fading. I had a longing that I couldn't quench. I couldn't figure out how to break out of the bottom I was in. So I started searching.
I came across a man named Dr. Wayne Dyer on television on a Sunday afternoon. He was selling his new book and meditation series. It was as if the program was tailored exactly for me. Everything he said resonated with me to a level I had never experienced. So I purchased it. And I owe the life I have today to him. Funny enough a few months ago he aired again and something told me to call the testimonial line so I did. And I got to thank him on national television for giving me the tools to live a peaceful and blissful existence.
There is a saying, "When the student is ready, the teacher will come". This couldn't be anymore true. After discovering Dr. Dyer the floodgates opened. Thanks to Oprah Winfrey and her series Super Soul Sunday, I was introduced to authors that furthered me into my awakening. Brilliant minds such as Gabrielle Bernstein, Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, Mastin Kipp, Brene Brown and Eckhart Tolle to name a few, changed my life forever. I learned to accept my fear yet walk through it, that every experience in life has a hidden lesson waiting to be discovered and that we are spiritual beings having a human experience.
I was also practicing yoga and meditation daily. These practices shifted my direction in life. They gave me stability, faith, courage and oh yes, the happiness I had been longing for. What I realized through meditation is that happiness has always resided within me. The same wisdom from within that told me to leave my unhappy marriage in order to have the life that I deserved. The life that had been inside of me waiting to come out. Waiting to be acknowledge, accepted, understood, lived to the fullest by sharing it with the world. I learned that if I shined so brightly, the world would start to smile back at me. That all of that light had been inside of me waiting, yet it was hidden by the shadow of fear. Fear can put such a hold on living if you allow it to overcome the love you have for living. I learned that every time I face fear I just have to breathe and walk through it, because I am on the brink of a new coming of events that will eventually lead me to my greatness.
I received a message during meditation to start writing. So I started a journal, that journal then turned into me starting to write my book, and eventually lead to me to write this blog. Never in a million years would I have thought this was the life waiting inside of me. But what a beautiful life it is. I've learned that life happens in perfect order. And that often times it can be our darkest moments that push us to shine our inner light brighter than ever before. To be grateful and thankful for every experience because all of them lead us back to our truest self. And if you go for what you want in life, life will never sell you short.
This blog was an idea that came to mind through the passion that I have found in living my true life. We can learn so much from one another sharing our triumphs and our disappointments. When we see others living a passionate life we want to join right in with them. There is no sense in waiting to live. Life is going on right now so let's make the most of it.
This was my spirit launcher story, my awakening. This was what brought me back to life. Join me tomorrow as I talk about how being in service with my careers took me to the next level of my awakening. Thank you everyone for your support and kind words with this blog. In the coming weeks you will get to meet other spirit launchers that will inspire you to live life now. I am so excited to share their amazing stories with you.
As always with love,
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Copyright 2013. Jennifer Fremion. All rights reserved.