Sunday, July 7, 2013


Expect only the best.
Hold wishes for the future.
Yet be open to everything
that awaits you, around
every corner.


Expectations are a funny thing in life.  They are what we imagine to be the end result of awaited anticipation, curiosity and exploration.  However, when do we let expectations get the best of us?  I think it is so important to hold true day to day in expecting only the best.  I think if we act in love we can make an educated guess that we live in a loving space.  Not to say there are never hiccups & bumps in the road.  But coming from love, we can better assess and address situations as they approach us.

I can without a doubt say that the best experiences I have had in my lifetime are the ones that I go into without set expectations.  The only expectation I have is that I am going to represent myself in the truest of light, expect the best out of others, but not bind myself down with finite details.  Not to say that I haven't done that plenty of times in the past.  Believe me I have done that countless times.  What I realized by doing that is, I would walk away with disappointment on my shoulders.  I would walk around with the burden of what I thought was supposed to happen and what didn't happen.  And I've missed out on what was right in front of my eyes that was intended to happen.  When we are control freaks and set out a plan as to how things have to happen or our world will be shattered apart, we are setting ourselves up for monumental disappointments.  The real setback isn't in what didn't happen in concern with our own expectations.  It is in all that we missed while we were focusing so much on the details of how we think things should have gone.

You can invest your heart too quickly in the wrong thing or the wrong person by setting out detailed expectations.  Finally when you determine the situation isn't what you hoped it would be or the person isn't who you wanted them to be, you end up in a state of devastation.  So then you start to monopolize the situation into what you want it to be instead of accepting the fact that it needs to be let go of in order to make room for someone or something better suited for us. 

I see this so many times in people who talk to me in concern with romantic relationships.  They meet someone and immediately start future hopping to what kind of a person the other is, what their lives will be like together, how many kids they will have, what kind of house they will buy and so on.  Often times this conversation happens even before the very first date.  They have all of these inflated expectations of what they think this person should be and what their future will be like with them, they don't even see who is sitting across the table from them during the first date.  Once they finally realize this person isn't who they wanted, they begin to make sacrifices in order to be in the relationship.  Then after so much time passes, those sacrifices become bitter ammunition towards the other person.  For instance one person might say, "Look at what all I have sacrificed for you!"  And the other person rebuts, "Well I never asked you to!"

When you have your own expectations of who another person should be, you are not allowing the other person to be their authentic self. And in sacrificing who you really are, you are living a farse as well. If who they are works and meshes with who you are that is wonderful.  But if they don't, that is okay too.  It is never acceptable to try to morph someone else into who you want them to be or who you think they should be.  You are fooling yourself if you think that will work.  Accept people for exactly who they are.  And if it doesn't work for you, let them go.  Don't hold on and waste time expecting that person to fill the shoes you have set forth for them.  You are wasting both your time and their's.

Inflated expectations are the worst.  Living like this we can make a muck out of any and all situations. Instead of looking for a play by play account of a scenario you've conjured up in your own mind, let go and let be all that is intended.  Let life come to you.  Don't get looped into the details of how you hope, wish or think it should be.  Because you will be disappointed every time.  Let life show you what it has in store for you.  And realize this, life is set out for you exactly how you need it to be.  We don't have to worry about any of the details because they are all taken care of for us.  We just need to show up, real and raw and open to infinite possibilities.  Whatever it is you could think up in your own mind about a spectacular future, the Universe has a way better version in store for you.  As soon as we start working with the Universe, we realize the true way to live.  We realize we are held and taken care of with no questions asked.  So live to only expect the best and leave the rest of the details to a much higher power.  One with greater expansiveness and creativity then we could ever dream to be possible.

What expectations can you let go of today?  Share with us, we would love to hear from you!

As always with love,


Follow me on Twitter @jfremion.

©2013. Jennifer Fremion. All rights reserved.

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